Saturday, February 21, 2015

Looking for love in all the wrong places

I have been thinking about the challenge this month and I really wanted to do my best and have great story to tell you.  Honestly I don't know that it will be an uplifting, spiritual, fantastic, or anything climatic. Life happens and trials come in and everyone feels like it would be better to go to bed and face everything the next day.  This would be me the last little bit.

I wrote that intro as I was listing to In Too Deep by Sum 41.  Here is the first part of the song that I was listening to.

The faster we're falling, 
We're stopping and stalling.
We're running in circles again
Just as things we're looking up
You said it wasn't good enough.
But still we're trying one more time.

Maybe we're just trying too hard. 
When really it's closer than it is too far

Cause I'm in too deep, and I'm trying to keep, 
Up above in my head, instead of going under.
Cause I'm in too deep, and I'm trying to keep, 
Up above in my head, instead of going under.
Instead of going under.

My husband was in the hall working on the salt water fish tank and asked if I was trying to tell him something.  I laughed to myself and let the song continue.  After playing it twice, and hitting the back button to play it for a third time, he asked me if I was ok.  I told him I was struggling to write positive  things about Love because all I can think about is one part of my life that I am NOT feeling the love from right now.  While trying to explain that to him tears came floating to the surface which brought him into the room.  He heard me out and then asked about us and if I was feeling the love he had for me.  I said yes I knew he loved me to which he suggested I should right about that.

When I have a trial, obstacle, or just plain life experience that brings me down, the focus becomes on that one thing.  Thats how I have been lately.  I got so consumed and invested in this life experience to the point that joy was hard to find and frustration became prevalent.  It took breaking down to my husband to realize this.  I was looking for joy, satisfaction, and love to come from the experience, but it didn't.  What I failed to recognize was the love and support that I was receiving from Eddy through every step of the way.  He was there to hear my complaints, rants, sobs, and everything else in between and I was definitely giving it to him.  He took it all in and showered me with love, but I was too blind by frustration to see it.  

How many times do we say prayers to our Heavenly Father with complaints, rants, sobs, and everything else in between and feel like we aren't loved?  I am here to tell you that our Heavenly Father loves EVERYONE and shows His love for you on a continual basis.  You just have to look for that love in the right place.  It might be in someone calling to see how you are doing when you have had a bad day or a tender mercy of the crazy toddler taking an hour nap in the afternoon.  It is somewhere in your life I promise.  You just have to look for where it is and not where it isn't.  It was hard for me to see at first but once I switched my focus, I began to see just how much love Eddy had given me and continues to give me.  I am so thankful for his words of wisdom and most of all for his love.

Look for love in the right place and tell us where that is for you in your life.  Feel free to share what you found.  Have a good week y'all. 

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